WhiteGirlWithaFatAss











{January 15, 2012}   What I learned on my winter write-cation

There are so many incredible things that I have experienced and learned this week.  I’m a little overwhelmed by the wall of work I will be facing over the next 20 weeks because whenever you are faced with the reality that what you don’t know so far outweighs what you know – it’s just plain daunting, you know?

But here are some things I do know after 9 days in Wroxton:

  • No matter where in the world I travel, it I am destined to be the ‘fourth dude’ rounding out a group of three guys.  However, it seems now I have reached the age where I no longer a guy-girl but Wendy to their lost boys.  I’m still processing how I feel about that…
  • Don’t eat Bangers and Mash after 8 p.m. if you plan on sleeping that night.  I turned into some sort of evil British Gremlin
  • You don’t have to tip for drinks when you are in English pubs.
  • We seriously need to have “tea time” in America – I will be bringing this up with my boss at our next status update.  I may crack out from withdrawal when I get back
  • Careful when you use the word utilize – it does not always mean what you think it means
  • They don’t sell rice pudding in Oxford.  Trust us, we checked everywhere.
  • No matter what country you are in, drinking red wine AND doing shots of whiskey is never a good idea.
  • There is an actual prison in London called “The Clink” and that is where the term comes from.
  • Everyone, no matter where they’re from, has a Keith Richards story.

For me, the greatest thing I learned here is to just admit all the things I don’t know.  I’ve spent years being afraid to ask too many questions and peel away the layers of my stupidity for the world to see. I guess once you accidentally brand yourself “White Girl with a Fat Ass” to anyone who has a working knowledge of how to Google – which is pretty much the entire world except my mom – fear of embarrassment is no longer an issue.

My best times during this residency have been my “Moron Moments” where I finally just fessed up that I didn’t know what they hell all these wonderfully well-read writers were talking about, because after I asked they explained it to me.  MAGIC!

I’m reading a piece that I wrote and work-shopped over the course of the week at the New Student Reading tonight.  I’m excited but also a bit nervous.  Want to read it?  I know you do.  CLICK HERE to donate to my virtual food drive for Feeding America – in support of the 1 in 6 Americans struggling with hunger and I will send it to you.

That’s the deal.  Why?  Because I’m in England and only have one night left sleeping in an Abbey/Tinderbox and I said so.  Cheers



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